I love my bed

When DH and I were first together and just SOs (significant others), we joked that the only reason I was with him was for the queen sized bed. I earned the nickname "Sleep Queen" because I LOVE the bed. Love it, love it, love it. And with our brand new mattress, going to bed feels like falling in a creamy pool of chocolate mousse. It's glorious, delicious, dreamy, and just utterly engulfing.

A good night's sleep will do wonders. That along with a lot of hard thinking and self-coaching. I went to bed last night and woke up this morning thinking that the angst and self doubt I felt at 5 pm yesterday needs to be replaced with a skin of steel and the power of an army tank.

I've also come to realize that any new job is hard because I have no context. Particularly, I have no notion of the history of the projects, the work, the people, the issues, the struggles, etc. In my current job, I have no idea of the history of this project I'm on. I don't know what came before or what is coming after. On top of that, I have NO FRIGGIN IDEA of the domain to begin with.

So, I am forgiving myself of any errors or slowness or density I seem to have at work. I hope my boss and coworkers will forgive me, too, but that's their problem, not mine (at least at the moment).

What I really need to focus on right now is coaching myself into not taking barbs personally, even if they're meant that way. I need to be a man: turn the tables and point out how the asshats contributed to the current situation. I will accept blame when it's deserved, but rarely are errors ONE person's fault. It's a collective development.

Thanks everyone for your encouragement! It's so interesting to me how virtual support can go a long way. Thanks Amy for the appropriate label (asshats -- ROTFL), and thanks everyone for the perspective.